Some people just don’t get it. It’s the itchy and scratchy show in your consult room and you’ve psyched yourself up to do “the allergy talk” AGAIN with just 10 minutes on the clock, expertly sticking to the relevant details of how they work, why they happen, what they might be caused by and what the options are.
The client nods and at least APPEARS to be listening and you think you’ve finally agreed on the way forward for their particular furry friend. You have tried very consciously to convey that there is very rarely a cure for this, but there IS a way to control the symptoms, that this WILL need commitment, patience and some money spent and that, especially at first, you will need to see the pet back for evaluations and progress checks in order to get the tailor-made solution just right.
You send them off with the best lotions, potions, pills and treatments at our disposal and arrange for the follow up consultation.
Except, you have forgotten that one pesky piece of wisdom imparted to you by some jaded older vet when you were a new graduate: That 90% of clients will be lucky to retain 10% of what you tell them during their appointment! Yup…you can talk all you like, young one….till those cows come home, till you’re blue in the face, till that pet parent has lost the will to live….and an awful lot of the time, you might as well be reciting the lyrics of Bohemian Rhapsody in a nice friendly monotone for all it’s worth.
And this is often why the above scenario will take place….. Meet Mrs Dee Manding who brought you her itchy itchy dog, Cadbury, last month. You ran some tests, you did the cytology, the skin scrapes, etc….you knew what you are dealing with here as unfortunately, you probably see these cases several times a week. So why is she back again with an appointment booked in by reception with the title, “O says dog is NO BETTER and is v unhappy!”?
Now if you are not terribly experienced in clinical practice, this is when your heart starts doing an anxiety tap dance on your diaphragm, your blood runs cold as you wonder mid-panic what you missed, how you got it all so wrong and to top it all off, there’s that strangely apt whiny 90’s ditty playing in your head like: “Now the drugs don’t work, they just make you worse but I KNOW I’ll see your face again”.
HOWEVERRR….if you have a few years under your belt, you’re less likely to break into a flat panic just yet and you might have a sneaky suspicion about what the real case scenario might in fact look like. You need to ask a few pertinent questions of our esteemed Mrs Manding, you see.
Your honour, we put it to you that the accusation brought before this court today may not be exactly what it seems upon in-depth inspection. The defence would like to call the plaintiff, if we may.
AHEM! Mrs Dee Manding:
- Did Cadbury show an improvement whilst taking the prescribed meds? ANSWER: Yes
- Why did you call to cancel the follow-up appointment after a week on treatment? ANSWER: Well, he seemed to be fine and I didn’t want to pay for an appointment when I knew perfectly well that he was better!
- Which medication is he still taking now? ANSWER: Well I stopped everything because he didn’t need it any more. PAUSE…. And also, my neighbour who has been a dog owner for OVER FIFTEEN YEARS, read on her Facebook group, “Mother Nature’s healing Power of Colloidal Silver, AC Vinegar and Tea Tree Oil -What the Vets Don’t Want you to Know”, that all those chemicals are TOXIC and should NEVER be given to dogs.
- So when did Cadbury start scratching again? ANSWER: About 2 days after stopping the meds. YOU didn’t CURE him and I’ve spent ALL THIS MONEY and he’s exactly how he was when I brought him last time! (having been left scratching incessantly for a further three weeks) The above conversation will be played out over the soundtrack of poor old Cadbury’s constant scratching noises as he frantically tries to relieve his allergic pruritis in the only way he knows how!
OK, so the good news is that Dee is NOT in the majority of pet owners and most people do in fact understand what an allergy is and that Harry Potter is not going to show up in a glittery dust cloud and shout ” OCLA-LUNO-INVI-CITINIB” and instantly turn your pet allergy-free for life with one swish of his wand, (and charge you a fiver for the small amount of trouble), charming as that would be for all of us.
I for one am immensely happy that there are a growing number of safe, game-changing medications cleverly targeted to stop itching so as to restore good quality of life for pets, thus helping their people who won’t get woken up every night by the scratching, tapping, thumping and flapping noises coming from their desperately suffering animals. Once again, let’s give a round of applause to our dedicated scientist colleagues who come up with these incredible modern medicines, monoclonal antibody treatments, immunotherapy and who knows what else is just around the corner for us to employ to help our hairy patients STAY hairy and happy and itch-free?!
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